Circle of Moms

 So I sat down by all the ladies at the birthday party over the weekend. It may not seem like a big deal but it was my first time. They were all mothers and I was one of them. Lady to the right has nine kids, to the front has 6 and to the left has 3. I sat with my miesly little morsel on my lap feeling very insignificant in my motherdom. It was like being in the break room at work with all the teachers and we would talk about our classes but now the job is being a mom and we were talking about our kiddos. I loved it. Thoughts about public school, traveling, home school, personalities, birth order, breast feeding, & curriculum easily filled the air as the wee-est ones of each was busy: mother of 9's found a frosting covered spatula, mother of 3's contendedly sucked on a nook, mother of 6's roamed around with jealousy as her mother held mine who spit up cottage cheese half digested milk all over her. The weirdest thing was the peace and calm each of these women just seemed to be soaked in. I have always been a bit anxious though I appear laid back. Stressed, discontent, restless suited me more then joy. These women were happier then any women in a break room I've ever been in.  Happy with their place, their families and their accomplishments. They recieve little or no paychecks and are the most contented and unstressed women I've been around.  I left the party thinking I should just get pregnant again.

Day One

Blogging. It feels weird doing this because I like being a bit mysterious to others but it seems like a logical hobby for me right now. I can't write in my journal much these days because of a carpel tunnel problem that I am ignoring til it goes away, which isn't working. I love words and writing and miss them both so. Lately I can't get away from the realization that life is just going by so fast. Really just to fast that I would like to use blogging as an arena where I can stop to process it the best way I know how through written words. It is even better that through this folks can read and share this short life with me. There are many folks so dear but hidden/distant from me and this seems like it would be a lovely connector & maybe they would be found again. Warning in advance: though I have been an English teacher for the past few years this blog will be FULL of made up words, comma splices, possible mis-spellings, and run-ons. I don't apologize. I prefer to use words like paint in my free time and not pay attention to the rules of language, which from hours of editing others' papers, gives me a headache. I can edit my own rough draft if my dribble is to be published but for right now it isn't so I won't.